Photo by: Leon Bennett/Stringer
Discussing the hot topic of setting boundaries, actress Lauren London makes a guest appearance on Facebook show Red Table Talk.
Joining the show’s hosts, Jada Pinkett Smith and Adrienne Banfield-Norris is therapist/author Nedra Glover Tawwab. Specializing in healthy relationships, Tawwab helps guide the conversation on how to set healthy boundaries.
London recently reveals that setting boundaries is something new to her.
“Recently, someone called me and their conversation was toxic,” says the 36-year-old. “And, um, I didn’t wanna indulge in it and I stopped it mid-sentence. ‘You know, I’m really not in this space. I wish you peace and love.’ … A week later, I hear that they’re talking so bad about me. … There I am creating a healthy boundary, and it felt like it went to slap me in my face.”
Photo by: WENN/Avalon
Letting the three women know that they can’t control how others will react to the newly placed boundary, the New York Times best-selling author states challenging the other person can cause resentment.
Tawwab shares that people should in fact create boundaries that centers around their wants need, and expectation. Adding that communication those boundaries to others is important as well.
“I think of it as a preference,” says the therapist. “You might not know what my preference is for something, so it’s my job to communicate to you that this is what I want, this is what I need, this is what would work best for me.”
Adding to the conversation, Smith shares her experiences with establishing boundaries.
“You’re saying that what we should do is we should really be able to listen to what people feel,” says the show’s host. “I gotta stop trying to fix every damn thing. That’s not my job either.”
Tawwab also states that people have the right to change their minds about what is healthy for them.
“You can change your mind at any time, you can have a new boundary that you didn’t have yesterday,” says Tawwab. “We grow and evolve, it makes sense to shift when we need to.”
Norris also expressed that she’s also had to set boundaries recently for someone in her life.
“As you grow and change, your boundaries are gonna grow and change,” she said. “I had a situation recently where I was like, ‘For right now, this is what works for me. It doesn’t have to work for you.’”
London has made her return to acting after experiencing the loss of her lifelong partner, late rapper Nipsey Hussle.
Tell us what your thoughts about setting healthy boundaries are down below!
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