Tia Mowry Schedules Sex to Protect the Intimacy in Her Marriage

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Parenthood can obliterate your sex life if you allow it. Between the long days filled with changing diapers, juggling work and family, managing schedules, potty training, homework, and the many other tasks on a mom’s never-ending to-do list, when you finally do get a moment alone, sex can be the furthest thing from your mind. For this reason, Tia Mowry, and many moms like her, choose to schedule sex dates with her partner.

The actress made the revelation during an appearance on People’s What To Expect podcast with What To Expect When You’re Expecting author Heidi Murkoff.

“We had sex dates,” Murkoff said of her personal approach to intimacy with her spouse after kids. “We had to have sex once a week. That was the rule in our house because otherwise, we wouldn’t get around to it.”

“Heidi, this is the first time where I’m admitting it: We do too,” Mowry added. “And when I was younger and when I would hear that, I’d be like, ‘Why do you have to do that?’ ”

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The 42-year-old mom of two went on to say that scheduling sex is important because it helps to prevent parents from neglecting that part of the relationship or marriage.

“But like you said, you do — especially with kids and with work and all that,” said Mowry. “You have to make sure that it’s not neglected in any kind of way.”

According to a study conducted by Family Lives, 86 percent of parents who participated in the survey reported having less sex after they had children and 73 percent reported that their sex life has taken a turn for the worse since having kids. However, according to the experts, it’s not simply a matter of exhaustion. It also has to do with a shift in identity.

“Romantic partners become co-parents.” Matthew D. Johnson, Ph.D., chair of psychology at Binghamton University, State University of New York told Cafe Mom. “These identity changes are accompanied by a reordering of priorities. Instead of thinking about the needs of a partner or one’s self, the needs of a baby become urgent and paramount. This leads to changes in every aspect of the lives of the parents/partners.”

What did you do to keep the intimacy alive after kids?